It was the first time you heard a particular note, drum beat or electronically created sound that made your ears tingle, your heart skip a beat and resonated with your soul. This is “My Song” – a series where the music that makes the person is spotlighted. Guest writer Serenity Fournier looks at a time when one song gave her the will to move past a painful time.
The first half 2008 wasn’t a good time for me. After I found my future ex-boyfriend cheating on me, I entered a downward spiral of self-deprecation. I always considered myself a catch when it came to girlfriends, and I couldn’t understand how someone could think I was a lesser. But there was something positive that brightened my gloomy days.
Thanks to the wonderful website Pandora, I heard Copeland’s music for the first time. Copeland is an “indy” band out of Florida that made/make’s absolutely music. Their second album became my drug to fight the depression setting in on me. Without their music, I was down in the dumps. No matter what anyone said to make me feel better, I didn’t understand how someone couldn’t see the potential failures of a relationship based on their past experiences.
I would sit on my bed, trying to figure out how I was screwing up so much with guys who were (in my mind) too good for this broken wreckage of a woman I had become. I would cry, pray, even attempt at writing some amateur poetry (it was terrible BTW) just to figure out a way to get past my hang-ups. Then I found a copy of Copeland’s “Eat, Sleep, Repeat” album. I bought the CD, popped it in my car on the ride from work; feeling the hopefulness moving through a brooding, cold atmosphere. Then “Careful Now” blasted through my car’s speakers. It was like Aaron Marsh was saying everything I couldn’t get out. “Careful Now” stayed on repeat the rest of the way home and reverberated in my apartment almost all night.
The song just made me understand what everyone was telling me: the wrongs of my past shouldn’t affect the rights of my present and future.